Sunday, September 12, 2010

Getting to know him...

I come to realize that when you lose someone close to you- as you go through life without them- you miss them at different times and for different reasons. Does that make sense? From the age of 16 on I missed him during my dating and schooling years. I wondered what he would have thought about the boys I dated- and the advice he would have given with the big decisions a person makes when choosing a school/profession and eventually a mate. Now that I have kids I miss him for the grandpa that I know he would have been.-
I was one of the lucky kids- I was older and had more time with my dad- a chance to make more memories. But sadly enough my memories are fading with time.
A few days ago we received in the mail something that I will seriously treasure for the rest of my life. My mom put together a little scrapbook (one for each child in my family) of my dad- a way for the grandkids to get to know who their Grandpa Stevens was- and a way for us to remember him.
Here is the note that came on the outside:

To My Children: I hope that this book will help to introduce your father to your children and future children. I hope also that it may help your spouses get to know more about you through getting to know your dad.
To the spouses: I know that when someone dies people have a tendency to exaggerate their lives. Although I did not stress faults or failures, I did not embellish the qualities he had. He really was as we remembered him. He was simply one of the best men I have ever known. I wish you all could have met him and look forward to the day that we can be together again.
This book was made with love...for him and for you..... I hope that you will take it and cherish ti with as much love as it was made. Love, Mom

The book isn't a life history- but just some fun stories and explanations of what type of a person my dad was- what he loved to do etc. I took some pictures-- (some are turned funny- don't know why) there are more than what I have shown- but here are just a few......




I think Collin has my dad's eyes-- out of all the grandkids I think he looks the most like him--(look at the picture on the left).



My dad was a HUGE BYU fan- I always miss him this time of year when football season begins.




My dad was so much fun- although there were times when his "enthusiasm" etc. was a tad embarrassing for an awkward 12 year old girl :)



My dad was SO patient. He never criticized us- or anyone else for that matter. He was always willing to help- even when I STRUGGLED to understand stupid math! He stuck with me until I understood- which believe me wouldn't have been easy!
A man that served as one of his counsels when my dad was bishop said that he was the most humble man he had ever known. He was always there for us. My mom reminded us of a story that happened during his illness... One day my dad was laying on the couch- in extreme pain- waiting to be taken to the hospital, my little brother Cameron came running in and not knowing that my dad was in pain, he jumped up on top of him on the couch to give him a hug. My dad grimaced silently in pain and without a cross word or criticism, he just smiled through his pain and wrapped his arms around Cameron and held him.


I know that my dad would have loved being a grandpa--and he would have been an amazing one.
I am so grateful to my mom for putting this together. For the expense and the long hours it took. I love these memories- and I love that I can share them with my kids.

11 comments:

Bree said...

I seriously cried for hours the day we got these. They are so great, I can't wait for my girls to get it, they will feel so jipped that they didn't get to have him around during this life like I often feel as his daughter in-law. No I did not cry more reading your post :)

Tasha said...

What a neat gift! I always tear up when I read your amazing posts to him! He sounds like a n incredible man & that is probably why he went so young! I love the S'more pics & Samantha's school pictures, but most of a ll that little Collin on the bed at the ER!! Such cute little kids! I love the pic too of Owen he is getting so big & more personality every time you post a picture with him! Miss you guys SOOO MUCH!!

SummerV said...

what an incredible gift. I am all teary reading about him. Your mom is so neat and thoughtful.

Amy Jenks said...

What a great gift! It's beautiful and is a wonderful way to remember such a great person!

Kaydee and the boys said...

You're mom's amazing. I loved looking at old-timey photos of your parents... you all physically look like him in your own ways (seriously)... and you all act like him. When I was there for Ryan's little girls' photo shoot, Haylie and I both talked about how much Ryan reminds of us Robert. And you have your dad's humility and kindness for sure.

He trully was one of the sweetest, most selfless people I've known. I loved when he was our home teacher - he always had the perfect things to say and knew when we needed help. Every time I drive by his burrial site, I think of him. You are all so blessed to have known him for as long as you did. I'm so glad to see that you keep his memory strong and that you talk to your children about how incredible he was. He really was. I admit, I teared up when I read this sweet entry of your father. Know that all of us Morris's have some great memories of your father... also be aware that you guys were all very good kids for him to have around. He has got to be soooo proud of all of you.

(I just gave you a virtual hug)

Tiffany said...

Love it- such a neat gift! I'm sure it will be such a treasure for your family for many years to come!
Hope you guys are doing well!

The Wilkins' said...

How sweet of your mom, and how special for you all! Such a great idea for his grandchildren!

Your kids are adorable as ever and I LOVE Owen's chubs!

Tamara Jacobs said...

amberlee, that is so neat.
your dad sounds amazing.

let's get together soon:)
love, tam

Rach H @ FamilyEverAfter said...

Amberlee, super cute blog. I'm glad you invited me, cuz I didn't know you had one. I have a private one too, so I'll send you an invite soon. Love ya!

Taryn said...

What a special, special book! Of course made me cry to hear just a few of your stories.

Amberlee, thank you so much for being a friend to me during this hard time in my life. You really don't understand the feelings of loss and hurt and confusion until you have been there and it helps to know that someone else "out here" does understand!

So thank you for that! And thanks for the blog invite :)

Josie said...

I Love you Amberlee. You are so great with your words. I have no doubt how proud your dad is of you and is watching over you always!